Flappy Bird

On the weekend I thought I was a bird. After dreaming that I was flying above the clouds, I woke up craving worm-like strawberry laces. I cheeped to myself wondering how I was going to get my fix of some sweet, sweet laces and after realising I was going to have to leave my nest, I got out of bed with a flap. 

Although a bright day with a blue sky and a happy sun, it was cold. Very bloody cold. I had to add on some extra feathers. I reached for this Urbancode coat. 

I went with my instincts and started to search the ground for something delicious to eat. 

As you can imagine I felt quite silly when I remembered I'd last bought a packet of strawberry laces from Tesco. 

After chirping to myself about what a silly billy I was, I decided to take off to Tesco. 

No matter how determined I was, I just couldn't get me feet off the floor. These ASOS over the knee boots must have been weighing me down, the sexy idiots. 

I gave them a good telling off. 

All that flapping got me feeling flustered so I flung off my extra layer. It's not because I wanted to show off my sparkling Sister Jane skirt to attract a mysterious magpie or anything...

Turns out no magpie could resist that shine. One soon came swooping down with his chest puffed up and started being very flirty. He even took these photos for me, tried on my ASOS hat and gave my New Look jumper a little stroke. 

I had to put my coat back on before another chap cooed at me and made my heart flutter. 

Turns out my magpie had already got me a packet of strawberry laces in my advent calendar. I'm such a lucky bird. 

Pastel Prints

Hello one and all and welcome to December! Tis officially the season to be jolly and I'm pretty darn excited, especially how this year instead of popping a little chocolate in my mouth every morning, my chap has made me an advent calendar and I get to unwrap a pressie each morning! Ain't I lucky? THANKS JAMES. 

Anyway, enough of the Christmas boasting and on to a different kind of boasting. You may be aware of the fact that I'm a freelance copywriter at my favourite place on planet Earth, ASOS, and when I was last there it was sample sale day. What a glorious occasion it was. I got a rather large armful of things for a rather small amount of money and look at one of the dresses I scooped up. 

This little honey had been sitting in my over-flowing saved items list for a long ol' time but I'm glad I left her getting dusty in the virtual world as she got to come home with me for a measly £2. Patience is key my friends. 

She's perfect for any occasion, a night on the razz with your gal pals, a Christmas party or maybe a day of shopping and kicking around some crispy Autumn leaves. 

You can guess which activity she assisted me on. 

The thing is, she's a bit of a diva and insists you only wear things to compliment her exquisite colour scheme. (Her words, not mine). Even my lips had to be the perfect shade of purple. She bullied me until I cried and caved in. 

She made me feel so vulnerable, although I finally managed to convince her that my DM's looked fabulous as a companion instead of a pair of lilac loafers or purple pumps. 

After she apologised for being so bloody bossy, we were back on speaking terms and I agreed to wear this ASOS coat and River Island fluffy bag. Aren't they a match made in heaven?

She couldn't stop rubbing her smooth, scuba-like skin all over his fluffy body. It was enough to make me blush and I had to look away. 

After splitting up the star-crossed lovers, she decided it was her time to shine and she didn't want her warm, lilac companion any longer. 

After I started to turn a similar shade of purple from the icy wind, I decided enough was enough and covered the little show-off up again.

Guess who's on the naughty step this evening?

Until next time folks!xxx